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What kind of a friend are you?

This blog is dedicated to my dear friend Nkima.

She came into my life back in 2014 when we started our Aspire Bespoke Program. We each remember the first time we met…..
I remember the girl with the long dark hair and her big smile with cute braces. I thought, ‘wow, what a warm and kind presence she has!’. I couldn’t quite place her accent but it turns out that she is South African but (like me) grew up on American series.

In actually fact, I had made a pact with myself, not to get too close to anyone at Aspire, so who knows how fast our friendship would have developed, had I not been so guarded. Being a person who loves people, I like to get to know everyone around me but on this occasion, the Aspire course was finally going to be all about me.

Low and behold, our friendship grew naturally around cameras and all things beautiful! She was bold and excited about life and I couldn’t help but smile when I was around her. For a while, Nkima’s positive outlook was too much to bare and as I was working in a job I hated and lived away from Bert, my sadness just took over and the thought of seeing anyone too happy was to be avoided. But she NEVER gave up on our friendship or me. Thankfully!

We are now two, nearly three years into our friendship and I cannot imagine life without her.

She questions me, my beliefs and what I am willing to live with in my business as well as my personal life.
She challenges me to be a better friend and to be more creative.
She shows me how to be a cheerleader and how rewarding it is to be happy for someone else’s victories.

We regularly share with each other, beliefs and notions that our mothers passed down to us. I wonder how much of how we are is down to our mums? Similarly, we were both raised by angelic, positive and strong mothers, so we owe a lot of how we treat other people, to them. I used to watch my mum interact with kindness and warmth, no matter how they were treating her and I have watched Nkima’s mum forgive and send compassion to people who have wronged her. Funnily enough, we now do the same.

The point of this blog, as well as be a huge soppy shout out to my friend, it to encourage you to ask yourself, “what kind of friend am I? How do I make my friends feel? How can I be a positive force in their lives?”

By Nkima being the best version of her for me, I try my hardest to be the best version of myself for her. I can’t say that it always works out this way and when it doesn’t, I know how disappointing it is. But when it does work, just look at how life enhancing it is with that person there.

Below are some of my images taken during a day out in London with Nkima and her camera, please also check out her website to view her incredible work at nkimaphotography.com.

 

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